bananacream

I have managed to fall upon another vice: Banana Cream Pie Blizzards from Dairy Queen. Holy crap, these are the tastiest things in the world. They have chunked up bananas and chunks of pie crust in this banana flavored ice cream soft serve type stuff. HOLY MOLY. I have had like 3 of these in the past two weeks. I can't help it.

Everything tasty has like 83974983274 calories in it. For example, these new treats have 483 calories. Whoa! That's about a third of my whole daily intake. Haha. And, I am obsessed with these cookies that Thundercloud Subs sells... I think they are just Pillsbury chocolate chip cookies, but oh man. I go in to get one yesterday and Shane told me that they have like 260 calories and 14 grams of fat or something. WHOA. I've eaten like 10 of those in the past month. Haha, oh well. I work out enough to not let it make too much of a difference. But still! Working as hard as I do just to remain static? I don't know about that. In any case, I heart calories.

I leave for my Dad's house for the whole 4th of July thing here in a while. After Church I am coming home to change and then we're taking off. I am both excited and not so much. I love being around my family and just chillin' and not really doing much of anything, but I always feel scrutinized at these types of gatherings. I am either too fat or not eating enough meat to satisfy lookers-on or too liberal or have too big of earrings or too white or I wear too weird of clothing or I am studying too "unconventional" of a major. BUT! This time it will be different!! I am remaining positive. It is so hard to be myself because (even if it isn't true, I still feel this way) something about "myself" just doesn't seem to be satisfactory.

I don't care now. I used to, but I guess that was before I had an eternal perspective on certain things. For example, I know that I am living how I should and I know that I am loved unconditionally by at least 2 beings in existence. I do what is right the majority of the time, I listen to who I need to be listening to. So, I am happy and will have a good time regardless of anything that may ensue. It is kinda sad that I get this much anxiety just spending time with my family. But, as we all have learned, it is easier just to accept it rather than expect change. We all have our little issues in life and I suppose this is mine.

Noble is nice.