A girl after my own heart.
Okay. So my sister recently added two new videos of my niece, Alexa. I COULD NOT STOP LAUGHING!!!! (mixed with tears - one of me and my family's signature moves). This girl takes after me, I'm convinced. I think Rachel can relate to this first one as I'm pretty sure we've reenacted this scene in our apartment...
And, this next one is reminiscent of my black widow status... getting that last word in with her boyfriend...
Today I've been going through orientation for my master's (even though I've been taking classes for a year, I wasn't an official full-time student yet). There are some brilliant people in our group - I feel like an imposter. I didn't realize just how few audio people they allow to study at Emerson. Scary.
Anyway - I bring the whole orientation thing up because I have been so excited all day to be where I am in life. I'm not quite sure how I got here, but I'm exactly where I need to be. Yet, every time a milestone occurs, I think of my little Lex (well, my sister and Zack's Lex, but I get Auntie claims!)... she won't be able to do these sorts of things. It depresses me, and I know it way more than depresses her parents. I get that she may have a chance to do all sorts of things in some other realm, but not here. Not now. And that sucks. I feel like this dark cloud has settled over my family and we're all just pretending that everything is normal.
4 Comments:
I know what you mean by a "cloud"
being over everything. We watched Alexa grow up with her cousins and it is not the same without her. Every new event for Dawson, I think about her and how she will not ever go to kindergarten, etc. And as more time goes by, more things happen that we want her to experience with us. Pain is supposed to get easier with time but I don't know if that can be said for the loss of a child, especially for Crys and Zack. Everyday they are slapped in the face by reality, they are amazing, I don't know how they do all that they do.
The videos you posted are the cutest, she is the funniest little girl ever.
6:57 PM
Yes, Lex is the best.
11:34 AM
Colleen, I'm so sad for you and your family. Everytime I see her little face on the videos I just bawl. She reminds me of my daughter and I can't imagine the pain. In fact I just talked to my Nana and Grandpa Taylor about when they lost their 3 year-old to cancer. They said it has been painful for their whole life but it got to the point where they could look back at the fond memories and be so grateful for the time they had with their special celestial being. I know nothing helps but hopefully the dark cloud will gradually be lifted. I'm sure Alexa would want that for all of you. I love you guys!
3:48 PM
Those videos were so funny and adorable. Thanks for posting them. I know what you mean, too, by the dark cloud. Matt lost his brother this summer, who we were very close to, and my boys miss him. It is hard to go on with life and act like everything is normal when a hole is in your heart. It will get better as time goes on. Hope you guys are doing okay... all of your family is in our prayers. Take care!
1:06 AM
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